One Woman's Quest to Lose Large and Ugly Panties Forever

I've had it with ugly panties that fit my large behind. I'm done with clothes for the large woman that just aren't as cute as the clothes I wore twenty years ago. I'm tired of wheezing as I go up the stairs. I've got sixty pounds to lose - because on my fiftieth birthday, I'm dancing naked in a thong, dammit. And it better be pretty. This little bunny rabbit is hopping me down the weight loss lane. I wanted a pair of big granny panties rolling through the grass, but I'm not computer savvy.

Monday, January 17, 2011

The Decision

OK. I made a decision. I went to see my regular family physician Dr. C. I told her about my worries with the "homeopathic hcg" and she said "Come in to see me. I have a 5:45 appointment available." (What is it with things just being available when I really need them these days?) When I went in I was shocked. Dr. C had lost forty five pounds. She did it with the injectable "real hcg" - the kind you have to have a prescription for. She was very reassuring and I decided to change tactics and do the injectable hcg even though it will be a figurative and literal pain on the ass.

So. I am sitting here at the pharmacy awaiting my injectable stuff. DH will have to do the honors. BA said she will do it when we leave town again for work this Thursday. I feel relieved and then weirdly guilty. And no this was not because the scale didn't move this morong. I have been harboring doubts and I figure that if I feel that way it makes staying on program doubly hard. Dr. T said as much when I really questioned homeopathy.

At this point, my only question is if I now have to start all over with the fat loading days and so forth. I hope not. I suppose i'll just have to see how it goes.

It will be interesting to see if my loss numbers show a rate of change difference. But at least I will have confidence in the procedure I'm using. This is the procedure that I used two years ago when I lost so much weight and kept it off. Then dad died and then mother died and that was that. It is weird how you know you are putting weight back on but you somehow either cannot or will not do anything to stop the freefall. Well there's no place left to go but up.... or should I say DOWN from here.

My First No Loss Morning

Well I hit a wall. Good Scale cheerfully told me that I am still at 206.2 this morning. I did an extra vigorous scale dance but to no avail. Then I thought - perhaps it's because I used tomato paste (25 cal) in my "chili" last night. But when I put on clothes this morning, they did not seem as tight. So I soldier on.

So I did make an HCG version of chili for dinner. Took the leanest ground meat I could find, gave self 5 oz versus 4 oz. Put in canned tomatoes and tomato paste (for about 50 cals total) and requisite spices and onions and garlic and was in Chili Heaven. And ate my sad little wasa bread thingie as my "grain" of the day. While you can have fruit and veggies on this diet, there is NO BREAD. I started to whine to myself about that until I realized I have a friend (Sexy Minister's Wife SMW) who is gluten intolerant and her whole life is about not having wheat. So I chastised myself as a Huge Whiner and moved on.

Today: lovely scallops on the trusty George Foreman Grill, with saute spinach and grilled pear. YUM. This eating plan makes you totally get your five servings of fruit/veg a day. Indeed, if I just did that forever, perhaps the rest would fall into place! Or fall off my ass, so to speak.

Went back to Whole Foods yesterday. This time, I felt somewhat less like I did not fit in. Cashier remembered me. Lovely woman, Eve - looks about 60 but teeny and with red hair. Vibrant. Will make the post church Whole Foods thing a routine I think. Because I'm sick of spinach, I bought Swiss Chard (which I like) and Kale. The Kale looks precisely like the tough skin of a dinosaur. How to make it?

The other thing that seems to be working is coming home for lunch every day. I have missed the socialization time with friends, but I think I might save money in the end and clearly I can have control over how things are prepared. And I get to blog. And I get to play solitaire. And I get to not work/return phone calls while I stuff a burger and fries into myself at work.

I have found the HCG Diet page on Facebook. There is a list of recipes (besides chili) I am going to try. I think tonight is Asian Night for me. It's only been seven days on this thing. They say that if you go 21 days, you make a habit of stuff. Whew. Fourteen more to go, in that case. But actually, I am wanting to do this diet for a total of at least 28 days. If I am Super Woman, I would go six weeks but we'll see how I make it. This is not easy. And if that stupid scale doesn't budge tomorrow, I'm gonna be having a Come to Jesus Meeting with Dr. Todd.